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Zen

by astolat

The hotel room was almost too quiet after the rush of the day and the steady drumming of the shower: the triple-glazed glass kept out the noise of Times Square, so the billboards flashed silently and the taxis and traffic slid by without a sound, like being in space. Kris stood at the window in his sweatpants and t-shirt, staring out at it blankly until Adam knocked on the door.

They were so wiped-out they didn't even talk, because they didn't need to; Adam just smiled at him tiredly and went straight for the $4 bottle of water on the bedside table that Kris hadn't been able to make himself open. Kris switched on the TV for a little white noise and they sat down on the bed and passed the bottle back and forth until it was empty.

Adam fell asleep somewhere in the middle of The Daily Show, curled on his side with his head pillowed on his hands. Kris was so zoned out that he didn't even notice until he turned to tell Adam something about the Moment of Zen. He switched off the tv and the lights and stretched out next to Adam and was gone before he even managed to finish thinking about maybe getting under the covers.

The air conditioning kicked in sometime a few hours later, and cold air blowing in Kris's face woke him up. He wasn't cold, though, and it took a minute to figure out that was because Adam was spooned up around him, one arm wrapped around his waist to cuddle him in and his nose tucked right against Kris's neck, breathing out warmly over his skin. Kris grinned a little wryly to himself and said, "Adam."

"Mm," Adam murmured into Kris's hair. Then he nibbled at Kris's neck, slid his hand right into Kris's sweatpants, and wrapped it around Kris's cock.

"Uhhh, Adam," Kris said, his voice going up in a squeak.

Adam's hand abruptly stopped—doing what it had been starting to do—and Adam went really still. "Oh, hey," Adam said, and then he let go and carefully slid his hand back out.

Kris was trying to figure out exactly what to say before he turned around, but Adam beat him to it. "Wow," he said, his voice shaking with something it took Kris a second to get was laughter, "I'm trying to figure out how this could possibly be more awkward, and I'm coming up with really, nothing—"

Kris laughed and turned over, relaxing, because it was okay—hell, it was better than okay, when that could happen and everything could still be fine. Adam was grinning at him sheepishly, sleep-tousled and with creases pressed into his cheek, his hair standing up in five directions. Kris grinned back at him, still warm through from Adam's body heat, his cock feeling kind of heavy and full from the little bit of petting, and then he was meeting Adam's mouth halfway while they started wrestling like crazy to get out of their clothes, hands sliding underneath, frantic to get at skin.

Kris spent the next half hour being really careful not to think, glad he was still so tired he could barely remember his own name, especially with Adam's mouth sliding hot and wet down over his cock, Adam's fingers doing things inside him that made him hear bursts of music like guitar chords, and then Adam sliding off him—

Kris swallowed, waiting, half scared and half wanting it like nothing ever before, except Adam swung a leg over his hips instead of pushing him up, and Kris had one dizzying breath to get what Adam was about to do before he was sinking down. Adam's head went tipping back slowly, meltingly, his mouth parted and his sweat-shining chest tinted red and blue with the neon outside. Kris clutched at Adam's thighs, too-hard, his thumbs denting deep into the skin, and Adam smiled without opening his eyes. He flexed his whole body once, twice, and was all the way down on him, breaths gasping out of Kris's throat uncontrollably.

"Adam," Kris said, "Adam, Adam," way too much like a prayer. Adam was already moving on him, slowly, his face utterly relaxed and beautiful with pleasure, tiny pleased frown on his forehead as he ground down.

"Shh, it's all good," Adam said, opening his eyes a little, bright under heavy lids, and Kris tried desperately to thrust up, to move too, though his whole body felt heavy, weighted down. Adam just laughed at him softly and caught Kris's hands with his own, laced their fingers and leaned against him while he kept riding Kris's cock, clenched so tight and hot around him Kris thought his head was going to come off.

It just kept going, slow build and the sleek roll of Adam's hips over him and Adam leaning down to nuzzle at his throat, rub his nose along Kris's jaw and breathe half-kisses into his mouth without letting him have everything. Kris came apart under him little by little, sliding into it and going so dizzy he was seeing spots in front of his eyes. He blindly reached to bring Adam along with him, clumsy and a little shy about Adam's cock in his hand, how crazy big it was—weird sliding his hand all that way, and the cut head all smooth and slick with wet at the tip, smearing under his thumb.

"This working?" Kris managed to get out, fighting to hold on, because god, he wanted—he wanted Adam to be feeling even half of this, too, the sweet slow burn starting somewhere in the hollow of his belly.

Adam choked out a laugh over him, out of breath for once, and his cock was jerking in Kris's hand, spilling hot and sharp in pulses, and Kris shut his eyes and let his head fall back into the pillows and let go.

They swiped clean with a pillowcase and mostly just fell over onto the other side of the bed, half asleep again already. Kris tried to tug the covers loose enough to crawl under, too stupid with fatigue to figure out how to fix the problem that they weren't coming up because he was lying on top of them, and finally he just gave up and collapsed flat.

Adam touched his shoulder, lightly, just the palm of his hand resting on the curve, and asked quietly, "Is this going to be okay in the morning?"

The crazy thing was, the hardest part about answering was dragging himself far enough back from the pit of sleep to make his tongue work; Kris knew they were looking at a whole world of complicated here, but he couldn't actually imagine swapping that for a world where he and Adam were anything but okay. "Yeah," he managed to say, groggy.

Adam relaxed and snuggled in again behind him, warm all along his back and mouthing a little at the nape of his neck, comfortably. Kris laced his hand over Adam's on his waist, and shut his eyes to block out the city lights.

= End =

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